My year in status 2011

The Devil's Highway

      I am convinced that SR 201 is haunted or evil or something like that. For 500 years I drove 60 miles to and from work (maybe more like 8 or 9 years), and nothing weird ever happened. The occasional car wreck, road construction, and other annoyances like that but nothing "odd". In the almost 2 years I have been driving 201 I have had too many unusual occurences. The very first that I can remember was I always saw the exact same car. It would be driving along 201 near me. What makes this weird was that I would see this car both on my way going and on my way back. Even when the times were different. Now I didn't see it every time, but at least half of my outings, and I am always out. I know it was the same car too because the license plate said "road runner" with some of the vowels missing. That lasted about 2 months and then, poof!, I have never seen the car again. Ever. Okay so maybe many of you will think that's not so weird. Just coincidental.
      Well let me go right into my next unusual circumstance. This is a first for me. One night as I was coming home from work late at night around 1130 I saw car lights coming towards me from the opposite direction. Now I just assumed that the car was on the other side of the road, but no. When it got very close in front of me I horrifyingly noticed that it was in my lane! Headed straight for me at freeway speeds. I swerved into the lane next to me (luckily there was no car there), and it sped on by me without slowing right up the road and into the night. ??? That gets your blood pumping.
      On another lone dark night coming home from work. Not a car on 201. There I am driving along and singing, and right there on the opposite side of the road for no apparent reason was a car completely consumed by large flames of fire. It was like a massive bonfire. Not one part of the car not in flame. And not a person  or a car to be seen anywhere. I really really hoped no one was in that car. It was just in the middle of the lane not even on the side of the road.
       After the last instances perhaps this next thing will seem trivial, but I think it makes a point all the same. I have never in my life with all my years of lots of driving gotten a flat tire. Where do you suppose my tire blew out one night late as I was driving along a dark lonely road after work???  That's right SR 201.

Sometimes I think I need a different shift. :)

ER. Not a TV show.

       I work in the ER. It's what I do. Have done for 13 years (not including my clinical years). People see me here at work or in "real life" outside of work, and they assume that I am a nurse. I am never sure if I should be more offended that they never think I am a doctor. However I am neither. Never will be. I work in radiology (Where's the TV show on us people?? We're exciting too!). I started out doing xrays and catscans for little ole Brigham Hospital until I settled here some odd 10 years ago at LDS. I chose here mainly because no one thought I could do it. Of course I am always up for a challenge. Nowadays I just do CT and that is fine with me. It's what I prefer. Since I am sitting here at work, with work on my mind, I thought I would reminisce through some memories and lessons learned of what it's like to be the blacksheep of the hospital family, the imaging department.
       When I first came to LDS it was the truama center vortex of the valley. This was before the Death Star was built a few years ago, and trauma services transferred there. Having put in 6-7 years on the truama team I was willing to stay here and let it go somewhere else without me. At least for awhile. I can always go back to it :). I have always been of the opinion that radiology doesn't save lives. "I" certainly don't save lives. But we seem to be a valuable tool for all the life saving people out there who require us to help steer them in the right direction of say, oh I don't know, where to operate or on what for an example.
        I have learned many many lessons from being right in the center yet not really a part of life saving processes. All truamas pass through CT. They just do. It is mandatory I think. The MDs learn that in chapter 1 of how to be a doctor. So I have seen the many sides of human tragedy, and I thought it might be fun to write about some of them. (I learned the hard way that what happens at MY work does not make good dinner conversation for anyone else). That is why I love my CT family cause we can kick back, hang out, and discuss the smelly abscess fluid we pulled from a patient earlier that day while eating spaghetti. No big deal to us.
       Let me list some things I have learned. Then perhaps I can add to the list on another day when I think of more. Lesson one - distance and laughter are the only ways to get through this job. Just like any other medical profession. The person becomes the exam and you find humor in all things. There was the one patient who I was trying to scan that looked up at the face of the staunchiest, stuffed shirt, never a smile, doctor standing there and said "you look just like Doctor Mcdreamy" Now that's funny. We all laughed. He should have.
       Lesson two - Sometimes you wish you didn't have the sense of smell. Like the smell of blood strongly emanating from the poor victim on my table as I am trying to position his body properly, or the smell of burning flesh as the orthopedic surgeon sauters open the skin before he starts a hip replacement as I am sitting there with the C arm in surgery (this is from my xray days), or yes that smelly absess fluid I drain from patients with infection.
       Lesson three- How to properly commit suicide, because let me tell you if you do it wrong you really give yourself a reason to be dead afterwards. I have seen several people who try to shoot themselves in the head. Instead they just blow off their faces and not even hit the brain. You will still be alive without a face people, but its not pretty. I won't give anymore suicide examples because I don't want to give any ideas. You are all beautiful and have a lot to live for.
       Lesson four- If anyone is going to whine or cry or moan it will most likely be the 20 something male. When I start an IV, the person most likely to pass out will be the 20 something male with tattoo sleeves up both arms. Go figure. The toughest people ever?? Your grandma.
        Lesson five- when they show you those before and after pictures of meth users. They aren't lying. Trust me. Never ever ever do drugs. It can't possibly be worth what you will turn into.
        Lesson six - I don't care what makes you want to put any foreign object up your behind. That is not my business. However if you want to avoid the humiliating ER (and tyically surgery) trip then don't do it. Your body has a nice way of "sucking" things in beyond reach. And besides that makes my job difficult when i am trying to take pictures and you are audibly "buzzing" on my table. That goes for the front too men. Don't thread boondoggle up your urethra. This doesn't need an explanation.

Stay tuned for part two :)  
     

The point when you realize you are as uncool as your mom was.

    It happened slowly. Little things. Like when he started 6th grade and didn't want me waving extravagantly at him let alone any sort of physical contact. Or yesterday at Lagoon when he preferred to go off and ride rides by himself rather than walk around with us. Yes. I am referring to my "teen". My oldest who is now 14 and makes it obvious that "mom" is not cool. I so am though. I know all the newest music. I don't dress like a grandma. I can use a computer and decipher the teen language (albeit not as well as he can). I can text as fast as he can. So how did this happen? He is awesome and quiet and very respectful. He has never said an unkind thing to me. He doesn't even complain about when he dislikes dinner. He's a great kid and I am so glad he is my son. I suppose it is the circle of life or whatever. I just want to know how long it will take before I am allowed back in. Perhaps when I am grandma.

The things people do.......

    So Shane and I had a first time, unusual, doesn't happen everyday experience Friday evening. It has been a long time (like a year and a half I think) since I have gone to the club to dance with the girls. The girls and I missed dancing (there is no better way to shed some pounds) so we planned an evening out. I took Shane along with me because it's nice for a group of girls to have at least one male presence for safety, but mostly because I just like to hang out with him :)

    Anyway Shane and I arrive first. The place is busy but we manage to find one lone empty table. The table next to us is reserved with ballons and such. We sit down and wait for my friends when a strange man comes up and starts talking to us very friendly like. Then his girlfriend/wife joins. I found it very odd but just assumed they were a very outgoing couple. Soon they tired of chatting (we weren't being extremely engaging) and asked if we had met the "hostess" and they wandered off. Well the hostess it seems was hosting a swingers party right there in that table with the balloons which was also including our unmarked table. She explained it should have been marked too, but invited us to stay anyway. Join the fun I suppose. Well needless to say we moved real quick.

   And this details our night of being propositioned by swingers. I guess that's what happens when you have a handsome husband. :)

Viva Las Vegas

  Shane and I recently found ourselves childless for a several day stretch. So we did what anyone would do in that rare situation, and traipsed off to Vegas. The last time we were able to get out of the state was on our honeymoon. This was a much anticipated trip. One of the things we had discovered early on in our relationship is that everything together is fun. Even mundane everyday stuff like shopping. So playtime is especially wonderful together. Did we ever play! We took a chance on Hotwire.com and landed a great suite at a great price at the Vdara hotel. Our room overlooked the fountains of Bellagio. Which I was overly excited about. We did the usual fun things....rode the rollercoaster, went through the shark reef, shot up the Stratosphere, went to Hoover dam, ate lots of things we shouldn't have, gambled (not very much), explored the casinos, sat by the pool, etc. We even caught a show. "O" a typically amazing Cirque du Soleil production. I haven't seen one that hasn't impressed. Needless to say we missed our kids yes, but we also want to go back. The worst part of a vacation is the return to everyday. Back to work and cleaning and projects etc. It is nice to be home again. Nice to see smiling faces and cute sassy personalities. So back to the grind, and here's looking forward to the next getaway.....

He makes my tail wag.

       I love my husband. I really do. Our first anniversary has come and gone in Feb. I still find him the most fascinating, amazing, kindest man ever. My days are spent in thoughts of hurrying home to him (or vice versa) and my nights are content and perfect laying on his chest. He is so supportive and does so many things for me and our children. He is quirky and nerdy which just make him adorable. The worst thing that I can complain about him is that he leaves all the cupboard doors wide open. Yes, all of them. Even in the bathroom, the garage, etc...

      My perfect Shane. My one true love. I finally found him and he was totally worth the wait.